Category: #TeacherMom

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What We Can And Cannot Control

I know the majority of people are familiar with the graphics or the exercises where you write down two different categories. 

Things I can control. 

Things I cannot control. 

You then list out everything on one side of the things that are in your control. Your thoughts, your attitude, your opinions, your actions. 

On the other side, you write down the things you cannot control. Others opinions, thoughts, comments. The traffic, the weather, politics, etc. 

It can be very therapeutic to take some time writing these down so that we can realize what is in our control and what is out of our control. 

However, I think we oftentimes only associate these things with other adults in our lives. We are thinking about our colleagues and neighbors. However, as teachers and parents, we often do not apply this principle to our students and kids. And I know that it’s true because I also felt like I was above it all and could control my children. In fact, I felt like I had control of my children. But do I really have control over their thoughts and actions? Absolutely not. 

So what do I have then? Boundaries. Influence.

Because I cannot control my children’s actions and thoughts, I have to set clear, firm boundaries for them to act within. I have the responsibility to teach and influence them.

For example. My daughter and I often play in the front yard, but we live on a road just busy enough that she cannot ride her bike or play in the street because there are too many cars. I cannot control how my daughter moves her body, what thoughts she has on the road, or her desire to see what it’s like out there. These are all completely up to her. 

However, I can have a good influence on her by teaching her the safety of the road, letting her know what the dangers are, and setting a physical boundary for her so that she cannot cross into the road. 

I still have no control over her thoughts or actions, but I’ve taken the proper precautionary steps to keep her safe! 

The same goes for when you’re teaching in a kindergarten classroom. If a child throws a huge tantrum and starts throwing objects across the room, can you control her emotions, actions, or decisions? No. You really do not have control over those. 

Can you influence her, show support, set boundaries, and control your own actions and emotions? YES! 

I’ve been using this strategy with friends and family when unwanted and unsolicited comments arise, by reminding myself that these individuals have the right to act, think, and say what they want, but it’s my responsibility to control my own thoughts and actions in response. It was a mind-blowing revelation that it can also be applied to younger children as well! 

Yes, we do need to set boundaries and stay a good influence because that’s what a good teacher, parent, or role model does. However, it’s relieving to know that these children’s actions and thoughts are not a reflection of you. They are not your responsibility to control, they are just your responsibility to react in a professional way to guide them to safety. 

Have you had this revelation of control with your class and kids? Did it help you while teaching to have a sense of self-awareness when it comes to control? 

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Private Schools

Let’s talk about private schools. First, what is a private school? These schools, unlike public and charter, are not funded by the government. They are independently funded, usually on tuition fees and donations from sponsors. 

Here are some facts: 

Private schools can have different purposes behind them. Such as a Montessori school, religion-specific school, a boarding school for arts or sports, a language immersion school, or a special education school. 

Since private schools do not have the same regulations under the government as public schools, their curriculum is able to be spread how and where they want. This can mean they may lack instruction in certain areas, or excel and go beyond the curriculum in other areas. 

Teachers in a private school are still held to the standard of teaching certification and background check, just like a private school. It’s common for some private schools to require higher education in their teachers, or specific training in the subject matter. 

Private schools do not have geographic boundaries like public schools, so often times private schools will have kids attending from many different towns in the area. 

Bus systems for children attending private schools are not guaranteed, therefore committing to a private school may mean committing to a commute every day to get your child to school. 

Because private schools are funded on tuition, which is an amount they set themselves, they can have more resources for the students as far as technology, special education materials, and more. 

So how do you know if a private school is for you? It’s a very personal decision! Some of these facts could be a pro for one family, while it could be a con for another family. The best way is to make an informed decision and research different types of schools to see which would be the best fit for your family! 

Has your family chosen a private school for your kids? How did you come to the decision that it was best for them? 

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Charter Schools: The Facts

Let’s talk charter schools! Like I said in my homeschool post, I’m not going to write these down in a pro/con list, but instead just a list. Because to some families, these points may be a good thing, while others may see it in a negative light. 

First, let’s talk about what a charter school is. Charter schools are funded differently from public schools, and but are still publicly funded and remain free. Some thoughts on charter schools… 

They often don’t have the same guidelines as public schools and can be more flexible about their curriculum and how it is delivered. 

There aren’t any boundaries for charter schools, typically they are open to anyone in any area who chooses to send their children. Sometimes this can mean only wealthier families will be the ones to send their children to charter schools because they have the means to transport them there. 

If the demand for enrollment is too high, a lottery is put in place to accept students, which can be stressful if you don’t know if your student will get in, especially if you have multiple children you are trying to get in. Limiting capacity can be good for the school with smaller class sizes and more individualized learning. Unlike public schools, where they cannot turn away a student living within the boundaries of their school, meaning classes must become overcrowded if too many students are enrolled. 

Often the curriculum of a charter school involves practicing what they learn in the field of where it applies. For example, during my student teaching in a charter school, a group of fourth-graders was learning about ecosystems in science, as well as measurement in math. To apply this, they took a field trip up to the mountains where they worked with the DNR to use weevils to eradicate the Canadian Thistle, an invasive species in Utah. They utilized their knowledge of ecosystems in that setting, measurements of plants, animals, and more, and were able to release weevils in the proper areas where it would help the most. Talk about applying what you learn! 

Charter schools can often be found with a lot of competition between students and parents as they compare themselves or try to see their schooling as “higher” than other forms of schooling. This competition can be on any level, between healthy competition and detrimental competition, which can vary at each school and even in each class. 

Sometimes a charter school can have a dress code for kids, too. 

Have you chosen a charter school for your children? What helped you make the decision that it was right for your family? 

cover photo: pexels.com

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Late Summer Birthdays: Hold Back Or Send To Kindergarten?

Even though my daughter is only 3.5 years old, I’ve been having a debate in my mind lately about kindergarten. Her birthday is late in July, so I’ve come to the tough decision that most parents of late summer birthday kids face. Send them to school when you’re supposed to so they are younger for their grade? Or hold them back a year from school and they are the oldest for their grade? 

I’ve been wrestling with a decision for quite some time now, listing out pros and cons. Sending your kids to school earlier when they will be younger for the age means they are out of the house earlier and accustomed to school sooner. Sending them later so they are older means they have more time to be a kid and don’t have the pressures of going to school placed on them so fast. 

The pros and cons lists are endless, I’ve been making them for about a year now! And beyond that, it’s so situational depending on each child individually, and their external circumstances. It is nearly impossible to know what the best situation is without doing an entire scientific experiment and analyzing both situations. But that is impossible to do! 

Here is where I am finding comfort- Kids thrive in whatever situation they are placed in. 

Sure, each child will have their struggles in school. Some may fall behind because they are younger for their grade and cannot keep up academically. Others may stick out and get made fun of because they are taller or bigger for their grade. 

Regardless, they will have successes too. They will find happiness and thriving whether you place them in kindergarten this year, or the next. 

We have yet to choose if my daughter will be attending kindergarten in 2022 or 2023, but once we do, you bet you guys will hear about our decision and the entire thought process that will go into it! 

Is this a decision weighing on you right now too? Which way are you leaning? 

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Early Childhood Activity Supply List

Probably my most requested blog post, finally put together for you! A grand list of my early ed activities must-have items. Nothing on this list to too special and majority of the items you will probably find around your house already! To see more tips on early childhood activities, visit this page here. This list is a good starting point if you want to be in a position to be able to just grab and go for activities. Nothing on this list is sponsored or endorsed, just a list from one Early Childhood Educator to another. 

Paper/Sticker Supplies

Construction paper

Colored paper

Cardstock

Dot stickers

Paint Supplies

Washable tempera paint

Washable watercolor paint

Rags for cleaning

Paintbrushes- I like the chunkier, bigger kind. Not just the small ones that come with kid’s watercolor kits. 

Office Supplies

Crayons

Markers

Permanent Markers- For you, not the kids! 

Kid scissors 

Pipe Cleaners

Glue

Glue sticks

Painters tape

Sticky notes

Sensory Bin Supplies 

Large storage bin- roughly 28 qt

Small storage bin- roughly 6 qt

Sensory bin fillers: A lot of these are materials I have around my house or material I buy for a specific sensory bin I have in mind. I do not keep all of these materials on hand at all times. 

Funnels

Small people or animals for pretend play

Bowls

Spoons

Ice cube trays

Muffin tin

Pompoms 

Misc

Toothpicks 

Popsicle Sticks 

Food coloring 

Dollar store or IKEA scrub brushes

Shoelaces 

Colored beads

Squirt bottle

With this list of supplies that I have on hand, I can pull out an activity usually within a moments notice and only takes about a minute or two for me to set them up, I’m all about the easy, simple activities! If there is something specific I want to do with my kids I will make a trip to the store for those items. 

Are there any other must-have items you keep on hand? 

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Look Past The Mess And See The Learning: Messy Play For Kids

Let’s have some real talk for a minute. 

Kids are messy. And that can be incredibly stressful. 

Messes mean things are out of control and someone has to clean it up (and it’s probably going to be YOU.)

Messy activities can be unpredictable and scary. 

But there’s a method to the madness when kids are building endless forts, dumping out all of the legos, and spreading paint in every corner. 

If you look past the mess, that’s where the learning lies. 

Take a second to look at the blocks scattered to every corner to notice the tiny houses built high, and the toy cars driving between them. Realize that this means they are practicing and learning about their own sense of community, using their fine motor skills AND gross motor skills as they move blocks and cars while also crawling around from home to home. 

When the paint is dripping from the paper take a second to remember that your child just learned important spatial awareness skills, got in some practice holding a paintbrush (which can later translate into holding a pencil), took in information on colors and the reaction they’ll get when colors are mixed, and more. 

In all of the messy play, there is learning buried deep under it, essential learning they will need for the rest of their life. 

Sometimes the learning includes boundaries, such as keeping the blocks in a certain room and not throwing them. Sometimes the learning means how to be responsible with the paint and not get it all over the walls and doors. Read more about setting up kids for success here. 

And part of messy play is the aspect of learning to be clean. Kids cannot learn the responsibility of being clean until they are given the chance to be messy. Kids are smart! When you have an ice bin full of paints and paintbrushes and the activity comes to a close, they are going to learn that the paint tray needs to be put in the sink and rinsed out. That their paintbrushes need to be washed, and the ice needs to be properly disposed of, with the bin wiped clean, before any more play can happen. 

If clean up also includes changing their clothes because they got them wet or covered in paint, that adds time. If they also need to wipe up the floor because they spilled so much, that adds time. 

They want to be able to go from painting an ice bin to playing on the slide as fast as possible, to they will learn how to be responsible playing with messy activities. And they will learn how to clean up and handle a mess when it inevitably happens. It takes time and practice, but it comes eventually.

You’ll see this translate to real-life applicable skills when your child spills their water and instinctively grabs a rag to clean up the mess, without you asking! Because they know what it means to clean up after themselves, and they learned how they learn best- through play! 

Did you catch how many times I mentioned the words “mess” and “learn” in this article? About the same amount of times! Because those two go hand in hand! Let the kids be messy, they are learning.

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Setting Kids Up For Success

I’ve written a few blog posts giving tips and advice and often say “set your kids up for success.” I give a quick little excerpt of what that means, but I really want to dive deep into this topic and define what it means to set your kids up for success. 

In a parent or teacher role, we set expectations for our kids. 

“Ask before using the restroom.”

“Keep the paint on the paper and reasonably clean.” 

“Do well this spelling test.” 

We can give our kids these expectations, but it’s a two-part system: We have to set them up for success to carry out these expectations before we can expect them. 

What does that look like? If we expect them to ask before using the restroom, we must make ourselves approachable and give them the resources needed to ask to go. Such as a hand signal or allowing them to raise their hands. 

If we want them to do well on a spelling test, we have the responsibility as the adult to provide them with the spelling words to practice before they head into the test. We don’t give them a spelling test of worlds they’ve never seen and expect them to do well! It’s unfair. 

If we expect them to keep the paint clean during their craft time, we have to be responsible for giving them the proper space, table covers, and rags to clean up any accidents. 

If we are going to expect things from them, we need to set them up for success before we can realistically keep these expectations. So during activities when I say, “set your kids up for success with a rice bin” I mean, lay down that blanket so the rice doesn’t go rolling under the fridge. We want them to keep the rice in the bin, but we all know that won’t 100% happen. When they are playing with oobleck or slime, set a wet rag next to them to wash dirty hands so they don’t track the material all over the house when they become overwhelmed with the mess. They won’t be able to navigate the road without giving them the map first.

When a spelling test is coming up, handing out the spelling words before the test is the minimum. Practicing the words is the next step. Giving them ideas on how they can practice at home is great too! 

What does this accomplish for us by taking the extra time and effort to do these things for them? Less frustration for us! Less time spent

It is so important for us to set our kids up for success! Give them the means to accomplish what they need in order to find success. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for letting our kids struggle a little to learn, but we still have a job as the adult to set them up with the tools they need. If you want to read more on that, check out my post on lighthouse parenting. 

What other things do you do to set your kids up for success?