Category: Reflection

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Parent Involvement and its Benefits

There are many different types of parents/guardians. They can range from the completely uninterested and uninvolved to the epitome of a helicopter parent, and everywhere in between. I don’t think there’s one “right” or “wrong” way to parent; everyone has their own style, and it often varies from kid to kid. There are obviously parents who are on the extreme ends of the spectrum, but I think that as long as you’re providing your children with the essentials— food, clothing, shelter, healthcare, and love— and not harming them, you’re doing a-okay. 

But I’m not here to tell you how to parent, or even to offer parenting tips and strategies. I’ll leave that to the parenting experts. I will, however, explore how parental involvement, or lack thereof, can impact a child. There are a lot of things that contribute to a child’s success and confidence, and parental involvement is pretty high up on that list. Before we dive into the why behind it, I want to add a disclaimer that I know not all kids have a parent present in their lives. I understand that all families are different. For the purposes of this article, I will use the term “parent” to describe any adult who is a guardian or caregiver to a child, in any capacity. 

Having the support of a parent figure can, and does, positively impact how a child performs in many areas of their life. Knowing that there is an adult who loves and supports them gives a child an increased sense of safety, belonging, confidence, and assurance. It’s similar to a tightrope walker knowing there is a safety net under them; they know if they fall, there will be something there to catch them and keep them safe. Kids who have positive adult supports know that there is someone there to catch them and help them. Being a child’s safety net is an important role. 

In my experience as a teacher, I noticed a large discrepancy between my students who had little to no parental support and those that did have parental support. I’m sure you can guess, but my students who didn’t have much support at home struggled academically. They often had lower grades, would struggle to keep up and learn the material, and often would be disorganized, unkempt, and would also frequently have behavior problems. On the other hand, students who did have parental support typically had higher grades, a more positive attitude, and less behavior problems. 

As I’ve thought about the why behind these discrepancies, I’ve realized that there’s not just one reason why parent involvement can impact a child so deeply. But what I do know is that if a child has someone at home who doesn’t show interest in what’s going on at school and isn’t aware of what’s happening in and out of school, that child is more likely to stop caring as well. If there isn’t anyone at home to answer to, many children see that as an opportunity to give minimal effort. I believe that often times, these decisions to not try or to act out in school or other areas are cries for help— a cry that they hope will gain any amount of attention from their parental figure(s). 

The reasons parents might not be involved can vary just as much as the types of parents out there. Some parents might not be involved by choice. Perhaps their parents didn’t care much about their academic success, and they choose to continue the cycle with their own kids. Involvement requires effort, and for some parents, it’s an effort that is beyond what they can or want to put forth. Other parents might find themselves in the midst of things out of their control— things like health problems or work responsibilities— and may wish that they were able to be more involved and present. Parents who have been pulled away from their children due to custody issues, incarceration, or other legal issues can find it difficult to be involved with their kids. Whatever the reason, these examples of lack of involvement can all have a negative impact on a child’s success to one degree or another. 

On the other hand, there are parents who are actively involved in their child’s life. They are at parent-teacher conferences, performances, games, concerts, appointments, and programs. They ask questions and are aware of the who, what, where, when, and whys of their child’s life. They help with homework and take interest in what they child is learning at school. They know about the report they are writing for English or the experiment they did in Biology that day. They chat with their kids while they make dinner, fold laundry, or drive to practice. The kids of these parents know that their parent(s) have their backs, and that they are willing to put forth the effort to help them succeed; those efforts are reflected in grades, confidence, and attitude. 

Now, I understand that not all parents are able to be involved in every second of their child’s life. I know that not all parents can make it to every game or performance. This doesn’t make them a bad parent. It doesn’t make them uninvolved. You can be an involved parent without being physically present at every event. Involvement looks different for every person. For some, it does mean attending everything. For others, it means asking questions and being aware. It can look like helping with homework in the evening. It can even look like a FaceTime call during an award assembly. You don’t have to be a helicopter parent to be involved. BUT— you do have to put forth some effort to be an active part of your child’s life. 

However you choose or are able to be involved in the life of your child, make it count. Make sure your child knows you support them, love them, care for them, and are there for them. Foster positive relationships, and you will create a bond that is strong between you and your child. No parent is perfect, and no parent can be to all the things all the time. But if there is a little effort involved, your child will feel it, and the positive impact will make itself known for years to come. 

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The Mid-Year Slump and Your Reasons for Teaching

The mid-year slump. You know what I’m talking about: motivation (for you and your students) seems to be declining, the weather is warming up and giving you a little tease of Spring Break, you’re tired of repeating the same instructions 50 times a day, and you’re getting really worn out from the incessant behavior problems that the same few students seem to bring with them. Some days it feels like you’re stuck in the movie Groundhog Day, on a never-ending repeat of the same shenanigans day after day. It’s exhausting. Some days you just want to quit and try again next year. 

I’ve been there. I get it. I know how frustrating it can be and how long the days start to feel. But I also know that there is light at the end of the tunnel, and there are things you can do now to avoid feeling blah about the rest of the school year. One of those is to remember your “why.” You know, the reason you decided to become a teacher in the first place! The reason you are doing what you’re doing. 

The “why” can and does vary from person to person. I don’t think many teachers will claim it’s the pay that made them want to be a teacher— it’s no secret just how underpaid and overworked teachers are! I also don’t think many teachers would say that it was all the red tape, policies, and micromanaging that got them into the profession. It also likely wouldn’t be because you enjoy being on your feet all day with minimal bathroom breaks and a super short lunch. No, those can’t be the reasons. There’s certainly got to be more to it. Knowing that the above listed are natural parts of the job of a teacher, there’s most definitely a driving force behind becoming an educator.

Perhaps you wanted to share your passion for your content area. You just love the quadratic formula and calculating probability, reading and writing, the process of photosynthesis, a particular method of painting, or the history of European nations, and you wanted to share that excitement with young people. Whatever your content area, you know that it’s the best, and you want to spend your career helping others learn about it. 

Maybe you became a teacher because you were greatly impacted by one of your former teachers, and they inspired you to teach. Certain teachers can leave a lasting impression on your heart and mind, and that impression can motivate you to emulate that teacher. It’s possible that you were a young person who desperately needed a positive adult role model, and that came in the form of a teacher, and you now want to be that teacher for someone else.

Another reason people teach is to help shape and inspire the rising generation. You saw the teachers in movies like Akeelah and the Bee, Freedom Writers, Dead Poets Society, or Dangerous Minds, and you could see yourself being that person. You could see yourself being the adult that these young kids could rely on and look up to. You wanted to be a positive influence in their lives, and wanted to teach them more than academic concepts. 

Perhaps you became a teacher because you think kids are awesome, and you love to learn from them every day. Let’s face it: kids and teens are the best (most of the time at least). They are funny, smart, and innovative. They know how to boost your mood and mindset. Their natural curiosity is inspiring. They are energetic and fun to be around. Their comments and view on life can be profound. 

Whatever your reason for becoming an educator, it’s crucial to hang on to that “why” for the days that are just plain tough, and for the weeks and months that seem to drag on and on. Remembering your “why” can pull you out of a slump and re-motivate you to put a smile back on your face and finish the year with gusto. Sometimes we lose sight of the reasons we love what we do, but we can always remember and can use it to propel us forward. Because after all, teaching really is the greatest profession on the planet.

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Ice Skating and the Classroom: More Similar Than You Think

Last week, I accompanied a large group of teenagers on an activity to go ice skating. They ranged in age from 11 to 17 years old. As I sat on the bench watching them and other patrons go around the rink, I noticed the wide variety of skill levels present. There were people clinging to the walls, barely staying upright, while others were effortlessly executing double axels and Biellmann spins in the center of the rink. As I seem to do with many situations I find myself in, I couldn’t help but think about how these varying levels of skill compared to the kinds of students we encounter in our classrooms. 

First, we’ve got the quiet achiever. These are the kids who are in the center of the rink, performing all kinds of cool tricks and moves. But the neat thing about these kids is that they aren’t doing it for show. They aren’t trying to impress other skaters or show off and brag. They are confident in their abilities to do what they know how to do, so they carry on, performing to the best of their ability, and constantly pushing themselves to learn new things and improve on what they already do know.

Next, we have the loud and proud skaters. These kids are the life of the party. They think they know how to do really impressive tricks, and they want everyone to know it. They draw attention to themselves. They might be in the center of the rink doing tricks, but they typically aren’t very humble about it, and they most certainly are trying to impress those around them. These students can be a lot of fun in class, but also know how to sometimes push it a little too far.

There’s also the easy gliders. I think this is where the majority of students are. These are the ones who are skating along, doing what they need to do to keep upright and moving, occasionally falling, but always getting right back up and continuing on. They will sometimes do a little extra trick or try to learn something new to perform. These kids are usually pretty well mannered and responsible with their tasks. 

Then we’ve got the kids who are gliding along the rink, doing only what they need to do to remain upright. They don’t like to do extra tricks, they don’t like to go out of their way to learn new things, and they seem to perpetually just go around and around, doing the minimum effort required to keep moving forward. 

Lastly, there are the kids, who, despite trying, are literally clinging to the walls, with legs flailing and skates slipping, barely staying upright. They are desperately trying to get the hang of skating, but just can’t seem to. They listen to more experienced skaters who give them pointers and advice, but for whatever reason, they still seem to struggle getting it. These kids are doing their best to try, and will cling to any amount of success they have– as they should!

Did certain students come to mind as you read about these different kinds of ice skaters? I can’t imagine a classroom full of students who all shared the exact same personality traits and learning styles. I mean, think about it— a room full of quiet introverts would generate some very awkward silences and lonnnnggg class periods. On the other hand, a room full of extroverted class clowns would lead to little getting accomplished and lots of exhaustion for the teacher. The point is, is that we need a range of personality types and learning styles to enrich our classrooms. Without that variety, I imagine our jobs wouldn’t be nearly as fun as they are with it. How do you celebrate these differences in your classroom?

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Dear Teachers

Dear Teachers,

I see you. I know your job isn’t easy. You’ve got a million things on your plate. I see those late nights spent planning the perfect unit and lesson. I see the stacks of papers that need to be graded and the list of grades that need to be entered. I know your email inbox has emails– both good and not so good– from parents and admin. You’ve got to juggle students with 504 plans and IEPs and find ways to challenge your gifted students. I know you’ve got that one student (maybe more) in your class that just can’t sit still and is constantly causing disruptions. By the time school is over, you’re tired of redirecting, repeating yourself, and helping students find their lost pencils (again). I know your feet ache by the end of the day from standing and walking around all day long. I know your voice is tired. I see you, simultaneously teaching the current lesson while mentally worrying about and planning the next several days. I know the PLC meetings, staff meetings, trainings, IEP meetings, and district development days are draining and time consuming, especially when you have a ton of other stuff you need to get done. I see you, taking time after class to straighten desks, pick up trash, and prep for the next day. I see you rushing to cram a bathroom break, lunch, and a minute to breathe into your 30 minute lunch period. I see you showing up to work sick because sometimes it’s just more work to prepare sub plans. I see you making hard discipline decisions. I see you trying to figure out seating charts because you know that those certain few students can’t be anywhere near each other without causing complete mayhem. I see you, and I see all the hard, tricky, not-so-fun parts of your job. 

But you know what? I also see the amazing things you’re doing and the really cool parts of your job. I see you taking your own personal time to plan and grade because you care about what your students are learning, and you want them to be engaged. The hard work you put into accommodating students with various needs shows how much you want your students to succeed. I see you taking time to help the one student who is struggling to understand the content. I see you helping them to grasp concepts. I see the smile on your face when you see the lightbulb go on for a student. I see you showing up, day after day, even when you don’t feel like it. I hear you saying kind and encouraging things to your students. I hear students in the halls talking about how much they love your class and how amazing of a teacher you are. I see those emails from parents thanking you for all you do. I see you worrying about your students because you care about them and love them. I watch as you head down to the counseling office because a student has turned in a writing assignment telling you about how they are neglected or abused at home. I see you helping a student get the resources they need when they tell you their family doesn’t have money for food or clothes. When a student has a hard day, I see you taking a minute to encourage them and lift them up. I see you attending games, plays, and concerts after school hours to support your students and their interests. I see you taking a genuine interest in your students and really getting to know them. I see as you celebrate the wins and mourn the losses with your students. They know you care. They know you are a trusted adult, and I see students come to you for help when they don’t have anyone else to listen to them. I hear the laughter coming from your classroom as you share a story or joke you know they’ll love. I hear you cheering them on as they learn, grow, make mistakes, and do their best. 

I know the days are long, and some days are really, really hard. But I see you, and I know you’re doing a fantastic job. The youth of today will build a better tomorrow because of the influence you have had on their lives. Thank you for your love, your dedication, and passion. 

Sincerely,

Someone who has been in your shoes

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A Time For Reflection

As we wrap up another year (how is 2024 almost over?!), it’s a good time for reflection on the past year and pondering on the year to come. I’ve never been much of a “New Year’s Resolutions” kind of person. I tend to make goals and adjust as I’m going along and see a need. I do, however, like to reflect on the year as it comes to an end and think about the highs and lows and everything I have learned as the year passed. As educators, reflection is a useful tool and can be used to propel us to be better teachers. 

There are so many facets to teaching, which provides much to reflect upon. As you think back on this past year, perhaps you will think about any or all of the following, among other things: classroom management, what went well and what didn’t, funny things students have done or said, and relationships with your students and coworkers. 

Classroom Management

Classroom management is one of the things I was constantly reflecting on and adjusting. What worked for one class didn’t work for another. What worked for one student didn’t work for the rest of the class. There was always room for improvement. One thing I always found when I’d reflect on my classroom management was that consistency was key. If I wasn’t consistent in my management techniques, I found that my classes were more difficult to manage. If students don’t know what to expect, they will try all sorts of shenanigans to see how far they can push things. And, as any teacher knows, that’s usually not a good thing. 

What Went Well And What Didn’t

Another great area for reflection is to think about what went well and what didn’t go as well over the year. Maybe it’s a particular lesson or unit that went incredibly well and you can’t wait to teach it again. Or, on the other hand, maybe you had a lesson or unit go terribly wrong and you find the need to adjust and rewrite your plan. Perhaps you had a classroom management technique work better than you anticipated, or maybe you had one that completely flopped. Think about some of your best interactions with students and make a mental note of what you did that worked well so that you can repeat that another time. Or, if you had an interaction that didn’t go as smoothly as you’d have liked, make a mental note of what didn’t go well and how you can do better next time. Whatever the case may be, there’s likely a million and one things that you can think of that went well or didn’t go so well in your classroom.

Funny Things Said or Done by Students

I don’t think there was a day that went by that my students didn’t make me laugh. They were always doing or saying things that made me chuckle. You know what I’m talking about— those moments that you know could write a book with or that you couldn’t wait to tell your coworker about at lunch time. Laughter in the classroom is not only a nice break in the day, but is, in my opinion, necessary for a positive classroom environment. After all, it’s said that laughter is the best medicine, and I think any teacher would agree with that! Reflecting on those funny moments can help give you the motivation to keep going in the midst of a difficult year and can help boost your mood on any given day!

Relationships With Students and Coworkers

Positive relationships with your students and coworkers are essential for a happy work life. I can’t imagine having to go to a job where you despise the people you work with; it sounds absolutely miserable. Taking the time to reflect on these relationships is an excellent opportunity to think about what is going well and what areas could use some improvement. In thinking back to the interactions you’ve had with the people you work with, perhaps you will think about what you do that fosters positive relationships. Maybe it’s your genuine concern and care for others. Perhaps it is that you are able to connect with others through humor. Or, it could be that you connect with people over their interests. If things aren’t going quite as well, maybe it’s a good time to reflect on how things could be better. Is it possible you need to focus more on others’ interests and needs so that you can better connect with them? Perhaps you will find that you need to slow down and really take the time to be kinder and more patient. Whatever it may be, I’m sure we could all take a minute to reflect on how we interact with and treat those we work with. 

For teachers, the new year comes at the middle of the school year. Mid school year reflection provides educators with a good opportunity to make immediate adjustments to things they see need improvement. End of school year reflection is obviously wonderful, too, but mid year reflection offers the chance for educators to think about what they can do better, then implement those ideas immediately with their current class(es). It provides an excellent opportunity for teachers to improve and be their best selves. And let’s be honest: we can all improve!

Happy New Year, friends! I hope you find a quiet minute to reflect on your year. Thanks for being here, and I hope the coming year brings wonderful things your way!