Doing What is Best For the Child #TeacherMom

I was dead set on holding him back for kindergarten.

My “middle of August” baby born four years ago has forced me to have kindergarten on my mind since the day I knew his due date. I guess that’s a normal thought process after spending years working towards a teaching degree and years beyond that in multiple classrooms and schools. 

Knowing he was a boy with a very late summer birthday, I knew I wanted to hold him back. I’ve had this decision set in my mind for years now. 

But then his course of schooling took some unexpected turns.

We had the developmental preschool in our school district put him through their testing to see if he could qualify for their free preschool, which is an amazing resource to have! 

After three separate days of testing he was able to gain acceptance into their program under an IEP for speech therapy, occupational therapy, and physical therapy, all while under close observation for a pending ADHD diagnosis. 

Whew. We just went from a child with a few sensory issues that we were working through to a full-on IEP and in-school services weekly. 

It was a whirlwind taking it all in and seeing where he landed with all of his testing, while then sitting through my first-ever IEP meeting as a parent and going through each of his goals. 

And still, the kindergarten question loomed over me. 

Because legally, this is the last year he can attend this preschool and receive in-school therapies as a preschooler, since next year he will turn 5. Therapies and schooling can only continue if he is in kindergarten.

So without the ability of sending him to preschool again as a five-year-old like I was hoping for, it leaves us with two options. Send him to kindergarten as a very new five-year-old, or keep him home for a year so that we can send him back to public school as a very new six-year-old. 

I know in many cities there would be many other courses of action that can be taken, like charter schools or private preschools and therapies. 

But unfortunately for us in our small town, those are not options we have. Keeping him from kindergarten next year would mean a full-year lapse in therapies that he so desperately needs more than I realized. 

It means redoing all of his testing to place him back into these therapies when he does start school again because everything would lapse and we would be starting over from scratch. 

I was set on holding him back for kinder. I was ready to put him into the public school system as a six-year-old, more prepared and ready to take on the world with an extra year of playing outside in the sticks and mud instead of sitting at a desk. 

But what wins out over what I want, is what he needs. Yes, I want to hold him back a year and I can see the benefits tenfold of sending him to kindergarten later. But I can see the better, higher benefits of sending him earlier, despite my wishes. 

Because in the end, the best decision you can make is whatever is best for the child. Always. 

Cover Photo: Mallory Wilcox

Late Summer Birthdays: Hold Back Or Send To Kindergarten?

Even though my daughter is only 3.5 years old, I’ve been having a debate in my mind lately about kindergarten. Her birthday is late in July, so I’ve come to the tough decision that most parents of late summer birthday kids face. Send them to school when you’re supposed to so they are younger for their grade? Or hold them back a year from school and they are the oldest for their grade? 

I’ve been wrestling with a decision for quite some time now, listing out pros and cons. Sending your kids to school earlier when they will be younger for the age means they are out of the house earlier and accustomed to school sooner. Sending them later so they are older means they have more time to be a kid and don’t have the pressures of going to school placed on them so fast. 

The pros and cons lists are endless, I’ve been making them for about a year now! And beyond that, it’s so situational depending on each child individually, and their external circumstances. It is nearly impossible to know what the best situation is without doing an entire scientific experiment and analyzing both situations. But that is impossible to do! 

Here is where I am finding comfort- Kids thrive in whatever situation they are placed in. 

Sure, each child will have their struggles in school. Some may fall behind because they are younger for their grade and cannot keep up academically. Others may stick out and get made fun of because they are taller or bigger for their grade. 

Regardless, they will have successes too. They will find happiness and thriving whether you place them in kindergarten this year, or the next. 

We have yet to choose if my daughter will be attending kindergarten in 2022 or 2023, but once we do, you bet you guys will hear about our decision and the entire thought process that will go into it! 

Is this a decision weighing on you right now too? Which way are you leaning?